dayName = new Array ("Sunday", "Monday", "Tuesday", "Wednesday", "Thursday", "Friday", "Saturday")
monName = new Array ("January", "February", "March", "April", "May", "June", "July", "August", "September", "October", "November", "December")
now = new Date
Jan = new Array
Jan[1] = "Happy New Year!";
Jan[2] = "Place quote here";
Jan[3] = "";
Jan[4] = "";
Jan[5] = "";
Jan[6] = "";
Jan[7] = "";
Jan[8] = "";
Jan[9] = "";
Jan[10] = "";
Jan[11] = "";
Jan[12] = "";
Jan[13] = "";
Jan[14] = "";
Jan[15] = "";
Jan[16] = "";
Jan[17] = "";
Jan[18] = "";
Jan[19] = "";
Jan[20] = "";
Jan[21] = "";
Jan[22] = "";
Jan[23] = "";
Jan[24] = "";
Jan[25] = "";
Jan[26] = "";
Jan[27] = "";
Jan[28] = "";
Jan[29] = "";
Jan[30] = "";
Jan[31] = "Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long."
(Ogden Nash 1902-1971)";
Feb = new Array
Feb[1] = "If you look good and dress well, you don't need a purpose in life."
(Robert Pante)";
Feb[2] = "Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest."
(Wilson Mizner 1876-1933)";
Feb[3] = "Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed."
(Mao Tse-Tung 1893-1976)";
Feb[4] = "The squeaking wheel doesn't always get the grease. Sometimes it gets replaced."
(Vic Gold)";
Feb[5] = "The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others."
(Friedrich Nietzsche 1844-1900)";
Feb[6] = "It is entirely seemly for a young man killed in battle to lie mangled by the bronze spear. In his death all things appear fair. But when dogs shame the gray head and gray chin and nakedness of an old man killed, it is the most piteous thing that happens among wretched mortals."
(Homer 800BC-700BC), The Iliad";
Feb[7] = "Never express yourself more clearly than you are able to think."
(Niels Bohr 1885-1962)";
Feb[8] = "Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face."
(Dave Barry 1947- )";
Feb[9] = "What power has law where only money rules."
(Gaius Petronius ~66)";
Feb[10] = "The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you'll never find it."
(C. P. Snow 1905-1980)";
Feb[11] = "The friendship that can cease has never been real."
(Saint Jerome 374-419), Letter";
Feb[12] = "It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember."
(Eugene McCarthy 1916- )";
Feb[13] = "It is a familiar beast to man, and signifies love."
(William Shakespeare 1564-1616), "e;The Merry Wives of Windsor"e;, Act 1 scene 1";
Feb[14] = "Treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster."
(Quentin Crisp)";
Feb[15] = "When you think of the long and gloomy history of man, you will find more hideous crimes have been committed in the name of obedience than have ever been committed in the name of rebellion."
(C. P. Snow 1905-1980)";
Feb[16] = "My loathings are simple: stupidity, oppression, crime, cruelty, soft music."
(Vladimir Nabokov 1899-1977)";
Feb[17] = "But O the truth, the truth. The many eyes That look on it! The diverse things they see."
(George Meredith 1828-1909)";
Feb[18] = "There is an art of which every man should be a master the art of reflection. If you are not a thinking man, to what purpose are you a man at all?"
(William Hart Coleridge)";
Feb[19] = "There is nothing so ridiculous but some philosopher has said it."
(Cicero 106BC-43BC), De Divinatione";
Feb[20] = "We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves to be like other people."
(Arthur Schopenhauer 1788-1860)";
Feb[21] = "An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support."
(John Buchan 1875-1940)";
Feb[22] = "Human nature constitutes a part of the evidence in every case."
(Elisha Potter)";
Feb[23] = "Weather forecast for tonight: dark."
(George Carlin 1937- )";
Feb[24] = "It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper."
(Jerry Seinfeld 1954- )";
Feb[25] = "The mind ought sometimes to be diverted that it may return the better to thinking."
(Phaedrus 15BC- 50)";
Feb[26] = "The great successful men of the world have used their imagination... they think ahead and create their mental picture in all its details, filling in here, adding a little there, altering this a bit and that a bit, but steadily building. "
(Robert Collier)";
Feb[27] = "Each time you are honest and conduct yourself with honesty, a success force will drive you toward greater success. Each time you lie, even with a little white lie, there are strong forces pushing you toward failure. "
(Joseph Sugarman)";
Feb[28] = "The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can't find them, make them. "
(George Bernard Shaw)";
Feb[29] = "Success doesn't come to you... you go to it. "
(Marva Collins)";
Mar = new Array
Mar[1] = "The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are. "
(John Burroughs)";
Mar[2] = "Every situation, properly perceived, becomes an opportunity. "
(Helen Schucman)";
Mar[3] = "What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it. "
(Alexander Graham Bell)";
Mar[4] = "The golden opportunity you are seeking is in yourself. It is not in your environment; it is not in luck or chance, or the help of other; it is in yourself alone. "
(Orison Swett Marden)";
Mar[5] = "I do not think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature. "
(John D. Rockefeller)";
Mar[6] = "The cure for all the ills and wrongs, the cares, the sorrows, and the crimes of humanity, all lie in the one word 'love'. It is the divine vitality that everywhere produces and restores life. "
(Lydia Maria Child)";
Mar[7] = "Life in abundance comes only through great love. "
(Elbert Hubbard)";
Mar[8] = "Love is the immortal flow of energy that nourishes, extends and preserves. Its eternal goal is life. "
(Smiley Blanton)";
Mar[9] = "What force is more potent than love. "
(Igor Stravinsky)";
Mar[10] = "Problems are only opportunities in work clothes. "
(Henry J. Kaiser)";
Mar[11] = "Opportunities? They are all around us... there is power lying latent everywhere waiting for the observant eye to discover it. "
(Orison Swett Marden)";
Mar[12] = "Most successful men have not achieved their distinction by having some new talent or opportunity presented to them. They have developed the opportunity that was at hand. "
(Bruce Barton)";
Mar[13] = "We don't need more strength or more ability or greater opportunity. What we need is to use what we have. "
(Basil S. Walsh)";
Mar[14] = "Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not something to be waited for; but, rather something to be achieved. "
(William Jennings Bryan)";
Mar[15] = "Opportunity rarely knocks on your door. Knock rather on opportunity's door if you ardently wish to enter. "
(B.C. Forbes)";
Mar[16] = "Each problem has hidden in it an opportunity so powerful that it literally dwarfs the problem. The greatest success stories were created by people who recognized a problem and turned it into an opportunity. "
(Joseph Sugarman)";
Mar[17] = "In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. "
(Albert Einstein)";
Mar[18] = "A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. "
(Francois Bacon)";
Mar[19] = "There is no future in any job. The future lies in the man who holds the job. "
(George Crane)";
Mar[20] = "Opportunity... often it comes in the form of misfortune, or temporary defeat. "
(Napoleon Hill)";
Mar[21] = "The price of success is perseverance. The price of failure comes cheaper. "
(Anonymous)";
Mar[22] = "Adversity reveals genius, prosperity conceals it. "
(Horace)";
Mar[23] = "Everyone will experience the consequences of his own acts. If his acts are right, he'll get good consequences; if they're not, he'll suffer for it. "
(Harry Browne)";
Mar[24] = "Whatever our creed, we feel that no good deed can by any possibility go unrewarded, no evil deed unpunished. "
(Orison Swett Marden)";
Mar[25] = "You cannot do wrong without suffering wrong. "
(Ralph Waldo Emerson)";
Mar[26] = "Choose the way of life. Choose the way of love. Choose the way of caring...Choose the way of goodness. It's up to you. It's your choice. "
(Leo Buscaglia)";
Mar[27] = "I contend that dishonesty will create a failure force that often manifests itself in other ways - ways not apparent to the outside observer. "
(Joseph Sugarman)";
Mar[28] = "He has spent his life has enjoyed it most."
(Samuel Butler)";
Mar[29] = "He gains everyone's approval who mixes the pleasant with the useful."
(Horace)";
Mar[30] = "The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control."
(Ogden Nash)";
Mar[31] = "When you can't have what you want, it's time to start wanting what you have."
(Kathleen A. Sutton)";
Apr = new Array
Apr[1] = "The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches, but to reveal to him his own."
(Disraeli)";
Apr[2] = "You can have it all. You just can's have it all at once."
(Oprah Winfrey)";
Apr[3] = "Never fear shadows. They simply mean there is a light shining somewhere nearby."
(Ruth E Renkel)";
Apr[4] = "Nobody minds having what is too good for them."
(Jane Austen)";
Apr[5] = "Money brings more happiness. But after a certain point it just brings more money."
(Neil Simon)";
Apr[6] = "Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough and more."
(Melody Beattie)";
Apr[7] = "As for me, I know nothing else but miracles."
(Walt Whitman)";
Apr[8] = "Never forget that all you have is all you need."
(Sarah Ban Breathnach)";
Apr[9] = "Home is an invention on which no one has yet improved."
(Anon)";
Apr[10] = "Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. "
(Sam Levenson 1911-1980)";
Apr[11] = "I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it. "
(Garrison Keillor 1942- )";
Apr[12] = "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.Benjamin Disraeli "
(1804-1881)";
Apr[13] = "Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings."
(Ed Gardner)";
Apr[14] = "Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing. "
(Oscar Wilde 1854-1900)";
Apr[15] = "To have doubted one's own first principles is the mark of a civilized man."
(Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. 1841-1935)";
Apr[16] = "Most people ignore most poetry because most poetry ignores most people."
(Adrian Mitchell)";
Apr[17] = "It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race."
(Mark Twain 1835-1910), The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn";
Apr[18] = "";
Apr[19] = "";
Apr[20] = "";
Apr[21] = "";
Apr[22] = "";
Apr[23] = "";
Apr[24] = "";
Apr[25] = "";
Apr[26] = "";
Apr[27] = "";
Apr[28] = "";
Apr[29] = "";
Apr[30] = "";
May = new Array
May[1] = "";
May[2] = "";
May[3] = "";
May[4] = "";
May[5] = "";
May[6] = "";
May[7] = "";
May[8] = "";
May[9] = "";
May[10] = "";
May[11] = "";
May[12] = "";
May[13] = "";
May[14] = "";
May[15] = "";
May[16] = "";
May[17] = "";
May[18] = "";
May[19] = "";
May[20] = "";
May[21] = "";
May[22] = "";
May[23] = "";
May[24] = "";
May[25] = "";
May[26] = "";
May[27] = "";
May[28] = "";
May[29] = "";
May[30] = "";
May[31] = "";
Jun = new Array
Jun[1] = "";
Jun[2] = "";
Jun[3] = "";
Jun[4] = "";
Jun[5] = "";
Jun[6] = "";
Jun[7] = "";
Jun[8] = "";
Jun[9] = "";
Jun[10] = "";
Jun[11] = "";
Jun[12] = "";
Jun[13] = "";
Jun[14] = "";
Jun[15] = "";
Jun[16] = "";
Jun[17] = "";
Jun[18] = "";
Jun[19] = "";
Jun[20] = "";
Jun[21] = "";
Jun[22] = "";
Jun[23] = "";
Jun[24] = "";
Jun[25] = "";
Jun[26] = "";
Jun[27] = "";
Jun[28] = "";
Jun[29] = "";
Jun[30] = "";
Jul = new Array
Jul[1] = "";
Jul[2] = "";
Jul[3] = "";
Jul[4] = "";
Jul[5] = "";
Jul[6] = "";
Jul[7] = "";
Jul[8] = "";
Jul[9] = "";
Jul[10] = "";
Jul[11] = "";
Jul[12] = "";
Jul[13] = "";
Jul[14] = "";
Jul[15] = "";
Jul[16] = "";
Jul[17] = "";
Jul[18] = "";
Jul[19] = "";
Jul[20] = "";
Jul[21] = "";
Jul[22] = "";
Jul[23] = "";
Jul[24] = "";
Jul[25] = "";
Jul[26] = "";
Jul[27] = "";
Jul[28] = "";
Jul[29] = "";
Jul[30] = "";
Jul[31] = "";
Aug = new Array
Aug[1] = "";
Aug[2] = "";
Aug[3] = "";
Aug[4] = "";
Aug[5] = "";
Aug[6] = "";
Aug[7] = "";
Aug[8] = "";
Aug[9] = "";
Aug[10] = "";
Aug[11] = "";
Aug[12] = "";
Aug[13] = "";
Aug[14] = "";
Aug[15] = "";
Aug[16] = "";
Aug[17] = "";
Aug[18] = "";
Aug[19] = "";
Aug[20] = "";
Aug[21] = "";
Aug[22] = "";
Aug[23] = "";
Aug[24] = "";
Aug[25] = "";
Aug[27] = "";
Aug[28] = "";
Aug[29] = "";
Aug[30] = "";
Aug[31] = "";
Sep = new Array
Sep[1] = "";
Sep[2] = "";
Sep[3] = "";
Sep[4] = "";
Sep[5] = "";
Sep[6] = "";
Sep[7] = "";
Sep[8] = "";
Sep[9] = "";
Sep[10] = "";
Sep[11] = "";
Sep[12] = "";
Sep[13] = "";
Sep[14] = "";
Sep[15] = "";
Sep[16] = "";
Sep[17] = "";
Sep[18] = "";
Sep[19] = "";
Sep[20] = "";
Sep[21] = "";
Sep[22] = "";
Sep[23] = "";
Sep[24] = "";
Sep[25] = "";
Sep[26] = "";
Sep[27] = "";
Sep[28] = "";
Sep[29] = "";
Sep[30] = "";
Oct = new Array
Oct[1] = "";
Oct[2] = "";
Oct[3] = "";
Oct[4] = "";
Oct[5] = "";
Oct[6] = "";
Oct[7] = "";
Oct[8] = "";
Oct[9] = "";
Oct[10] = "";
Oct[11] = "";
Oct[12] = "";
Oct[13] = "";
Oct[14] = "";
Oct[15] = "";
Oct[16] = "";
Oct[17] = "";
Oct[18] = "";
Oct[19] = "";
Oct[20] = "";
Oct[21] = "";
Oct[22] = "";
Oct[23] = "";
Oct[24] = "";
Oct[25] = "";
Oct[26] = "";
Oct[27] = "";
Oct[28] = "";
Oct[29] = "";
Oct[30] = "";
Oct[31] = "";
Nov = new Array
Nov[1] = "Why do writers write? Because it isn't there."
(Thomas Berger)";
Nov[2] = "Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.George Bernard Shaw "
(1856-1950), Man and Superman (1903), Maxims for Revolutionists";
Nov[3] = "I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.Robert McCloskey, State Department spokesman (attributed)";
Nov[4] = "Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status."
(Laurence J. Peter 1919-1988)";
Nov[5] = "Nothing is said that has not been said before."
(Terence 185BC-159BC)";
Nov[6] = "When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my own country. I make up for lost time when I come home."
(Sir Winston Churchill 1874-1965)";
Nov[7] = "Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out."
(Samuel Johnson 1709-1784), from Boswell's Life of Johnson";
Nov[8] = "We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done."
(Henry Wadsworth Longfellow 1807-1882)";
Nov[9] = "I am at two with nature."
(Woody Allen 1935- )";
Nov[10] = "It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail."
(Gore Vidal 1925- )";
Nov[11] = "The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."
(Joan Rivers 1935- )";
Nov[12] = "When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers."
(Oscar Wilde 1854-1900), An Ideal husband, 1893";
Nov[13] = "If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead."
(Johnny Carson 1925- )";
Nov[14] = "The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the bore."
(Samuel Butler 1835-1902)";
Nov[15] = "Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence."
(Robert Frost 1874-1963)";
Nov[16] = "I've always found paranoia to be a perfectly defensible position."
(Pat Conroy 1945- )";
Nov[17] = "All generalizations are dangerous, even this one."
(Alexandre Dumas 1802-1870)";
Nov[18] = "The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'."
(Larry Hardiman)";
Nov[19] = "The point of quotations is that one can use another's words to be insulting."
(Amanda Cross 1926- )";
Nov[20] = "I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him."
(Mark Twain 1835-1910)";
Nov[21] = "The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't."
(Douglas Adams 1952-2001)";
Nov[22] = "There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don't know."
(Ambrose Bierce 1842-1914), The Devil's Dictionary";
Nov[23] = "She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon."
(Groucho Marx 1890-1977)";
Nov[24] = "The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true."
(James Branch Cabell 1879-1958), The Silver Stallion, 1926";
Nov[25] = "Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other."
(Ann Landers 1918-2002)";
Nov[26] = "It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours."
(Harry S Truman 1884-1972), in Observer, April 13, 1958";
Nov[27] = "Seeing a murder on television... can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some."
(Alfred Hitchcock 1899-1980)";
Nov[28] = "If you haven't found something strange during the day, it hasn't been much of a day."
(John A. Wheeler)";
Nov[29] = "Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so."
(Gore Vidal 1925- )";
Nov[30] = "Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under communism, it's just the opposite."
(John Kenneth Galbraith 1908- )";
Dec = new Array
Dec[1] = "I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on."
(Oscar Levant 1906-1972)";
Dec[2] = "What others think of us would be of little moment did it not, when known, so deeply tinge what we think of ourselves."
(Paul Valery 1871-1945)";
Dec[3] = "After being Turned Down by numerous Publishers, he had decided to write for Posterity."
(George Ade 1866-1944), "e;Fables in Slang"e;, 1899";
Dec[4] = "I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know."
(Mark Twain 1835-1910)";
Dec[5] = "My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind."
(Albert Einstein 1879-1955)";
Dec[6] = "Few people think more than two or three times a year; I have made an international reputation for myself by thinking once or twice a week."
(George Bernard Shaw 1856-1950)";
Dec[7] = "We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by."
(Will Rogers 1879-1935)";
Dec[8] = "Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy."
(H. L. Mencken 1880-1956)";
Dec[9] = "Every generation laughs at the old fashions, but follows religiously the new."
(Henry David Thoreau 1817-1862), "e;Walden"e;, 1854";
Dec[10] = "Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation."
(Kin Hubbard 1868-1930)";
Dec[11] = "A little learning is a dangerous thing but a lot of ignorance is just as bad."
(Bob Edwards)";
Dec[12] = "If mankind minus one were of one opinion, then mankind is no more justified in silencing the one than the one - if he had the power - would be justified in silencing mankind."
(John Stuart Mill 1806-1873)";
Dec[13] = "The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work."
(Richard Bach)";
Dec[14] = "In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock."
(Thomas Jefferson 1743-1826)";
Dec[15] = "I'm a born-again atheist."
(Gore Vidal 1925- )";
Dec[16] = "O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet."
(Saint Augustine 354-430)";
Dec[17] = "Man is so made that he can only find relaxation from one kind of labor by taking up another."
(Anatole France 1844-1924), The Crime of Sylvestre Bonnard";
Dec[18] = "Hell is full of musical amateurs."
(George Bernard Shaw 1856-1950)";
Dec[19] = "The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale."
(Arthur C. Clarke 1917- )";
Dec[20] = "A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world."
(Edmond de Concourt 1822-1896)";
Dec[21] = "Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity."
(Johann Wolfgang von Goethe 1749-1832)";
Dec[22] = "In a mad world only the mad are sane."
(Akira Kurosawa 1910- )";
Dec[23] = "The best way to keep one's word is not to give it."
(Napoleon Bonaparte 1769-1821)";
Dec[24] = "The effort to understand the universe is one of the very few things that lifts human life a little above the level of farce, and gives it some of the grace of tragedy."
(Steven Weinberg 1933- )";
Dec[25] = "Merry Christmas to all";
Dec[26] = "Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first woman she meets and then teams up with three complete strangers to kill again."
(Unknown, Marin County newspaper's TV listing for "e;The Wizard of Oz"e;)";
Dec[27] = "Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough."
(George Bernard Shaw 1856-1950)";
Dec[28] = "No hatred is so bitter as that of near relations. "
(Cornelius Tacitus 55-117)";
Dec[29] = "Faith is a cop-out. If the only way you can accept an assertion is by faith, then you are conceding that it can’t be taken on its own merits."
(Dan Barker, "e;Losing Faith in Faith"e;, 1992";
Dec[30] = "There is nothing more dread and more shameless than a woman who plans such deeds in her heart as the foul deed which she plotted when she contrived her husband's murder."
(Homer 800BC-700BC), The Odyssey";
Dec[31] = "";